Bride of Wildenstein

by Marsian DeLellis directed by Marsian DeLellis and Leila Ghaznavi
performed at: Velaslavasay Panorama opened: January 28, 2010
performed at: O'Neill Theater Center opened: June 19, 2009
performed at: CalArts Light Lab opened: May 8, 2009


Bride of Wildenstein was my first attempt at composition for a musical. While I had written music for the theater before, this would be first time I would be responsible for all musical content. Marsian DeLellis and PJ McWhiskers wrote the lyrics and book while I worked on the score. We both had high hopes for this show, but decided to part ways after the show ceased moving forward shortly after our poorly received January 2010 premiere in Los Angeles.


This one-man adult puppet show chronicles the life and times of Jocelyn Wildenstein, a Hollywood socialite who intends to capture the waning interest of her philandering game-hunting husband by getting plastic surgery to look more like his prized possession, a taxidermized lion head. She ends up on the street, caterwauling her Fucked Up Memories before being captured by the ASPCA and being adopted by lesbians! Jocelyn was joined by a cast of puppets including Alec, her husband, May Moon, her monkey friend, and a cockroach, pigeon, and rat doctor!


Bride of Wildenstein Overture Download Link

Mr. DeLellis and I parted on unfriendly terms, so I can no longer publicly distribute any music with the lyrics intact. However, I produced an overture shortly before our initial opening at the CalArts Light Lab in May 2008. The overture contains the majority of the themes included in the production, though the music continued to evolve until the Los Angeles premiere.

Musical Numbers
  1. Stuffed and Mounted
  2. He's a Purr-Vert
  3. Squirt, Puff, Lift Me Up
  4. Cash the Check
  5. The Rat Doctor is In
  6. Pump that Pussy
  7. Fucked up Memories

Bride of Wildenstein was a one-man show, so I had to pay close attention to vocal ranges to make sure Mr. DeLellis could perform each character's voice during the musical numbers. I had to make sure the vocal lines were different enough to make sure all characters were distinct. The majority of the show was piano accompanied in a style that referenced Cabaret, Urinetown, and Cats among others.

Pump that Pussy Download Link

The penultimate number "Pump that Pussy" was accompanied with a digital track and piano improvisation. The underscoring faded out at the end as Jocelyn got injected with more and more silicone at the junkyard pumping party.

Fucked Up Memories Download Link

During the final musical number in the show, Jocelyn reminisced the Fucked Up Memories that made up her life. At the end of the song, she was hit by a blow dart and picked up by the ASPCA.